Carpe Jugulum

Terry Pratchett

Average Rating 8/10 (1 Review)

Mightily Oats has not picked a good time to be a priest. He thought he'd come to the mountain kingdom of Lancre for a simple little religious ceremony. Now he's caught up in a war between vampires and witches, and he's not sure there is a right side.

There're the witches - young Agnes, who is really in two minds about everything, Magrat, who is trying to combine witchcraft and nappies, Nanny Ogg, who is far too knowing… and Granny Weatherwax, who is big trouble.

And the vampires are intelligent - not easily got rid of with a garlic enema or by going to the window, grasping the curtains and saying, 'I don't know about you, but isn't it a bit stuffy in here?' They've got style and fancy waistcoats. They're out of the casket and want a bite of the future.

Mightily Oats knows he has a prayer, but he wishes he had an axe.

Carpe Jugulum is another throat-biting instalment in the unstoppable and addictive cycle of Discworld. It is Terry Pratchett's twentythird novel in the Discworld chronicle, but the first to star vampires.

Review by Chrissi (011001) Rating (8/10)

Review by Chrissi
Rating 8/10
Perhaps you have watched the old black and white vampire films or read books about Vampires, but the amount of lore about them is quite staggering. Some people even go so far as to have cosmetic dentistry to get fangs - but then whatever floats your boat! TP must have read some of the stuff about vampires because every myth is there - stakes, garlic, and holy water. (Or perhaps he just watches a lot of Buffy!!)

Verence is a very modern monarch, who wishes to be an outward thinking diplomat. His and Magrat's daughter is due to be introduced to the world at two weeks old and they invite dignitaries and people from all over. Unfortunately he invites a prominent family from the Uberwald - famously plagued by vampires and werewolves. The visitors happen to be modern vampires - self-styled vampyres, who have been brought up not to believe in the old superstitions and have been practising with religious icons and holy water - father used to jump out at them with the belief that whatever does not kill you will make you stronger.

The invitations to the child's introduction were poshly decorated with lots of gold leaf. Unfortunately the magpies stole Granny's invitation and in a fit of pique she decides to disappear for a bit which leaves Magrat, Nanny and Agnes to be the coven. She therefore misses the arrival of the vampyres and the ensuing confusion.

They try to put everyone under their influence, except Agnes and Perdita, who attract the attentions of a handsome young vampyre in a nice waistcoat called Vlad. He likes her as she talks back to him, although his sister says that it is not nice to "play with your food".

When they find that Granny is gone, they have to go and find her, crossing over gnarly ground to get to her. They have to take the baby and all of the stuff that this entails. This will amuse anyone with children, as the list of things that Magrat regards as being crucial travelling paraphernalia is fairly long, and most of it is educational, as well!

To cut a long story short, while not giving too much away, Granny excels herself, defeating what should have been an immortal foe. Death appears a little bit, but only as a spectre on the edge of your view. The introduction of a new character, Igor, is beautifully done, and he just gets better and better... the limp, the speech impediment... everything is there... his reason for having a line of stitches around his head is a classic, it really is.

This is a vintage TP, and I really liked it, but then you know that I have a special soft spot for Granny Weatherwax and the witches. As for Igor, he really struck a chord, and I'm quite chuffed to know that we will be seeing him again, as Nigel says that he appears in The Fifth Elephant and Thief of Time, or at least a close relative called Igor appears, you can never tell with an Igor!
Chrissi (1st October 2001)